Immaculate conception

[slipjig3]

There are some things that are very difficult to explain to a small child, especially one whose maternal instincts have been kindled by a cute furry little critter-thing. From the day Chelsea the guinea pig came home from the pet store, for example, Abbey's mantra has been, "I can't wait 'til she has babies!"

We explained to her, to the best of our abilities, that Chelsea wouldn't be having any babies. That she lives alone in her cage. That she came from a pet store where they keep male and female critter-things strictly segregated. That we're really really really sorry, but it just ain't a-gonna happen. But still, she rhapsodized, "I can't wait 'til she has babies!"

Ladies and gentlemen, do not underestimate the power of the deepest wish from a young girl's heart. Chelsea gave birth to two little black furballs today.

We have no idea how this happened. The pet store has no idea how this happened, other than to say, "Wellllll, these things do happen from time to time...." (Swell. Thanks.) The interesting thing is that we can't figure out how Chelsea got these things out of her in the first place. I mean, the little buggers are huge. I'm figuring that they started out tiny, and as soon as they came into contact with oxygen they plumped out with a little *poof!* like popcorn.

And is Abbey a wee bit excited about this? *snerk* Don't even get me started.

Comments

[vulpine137.livejournal.com]

*laugh* Emmaculate conception with guinea pigs. Who'd have thunk it.

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

Maybe she was just really, really bored in that cage. Gods know the things I come up with at work.

[adamchristopher.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, what a TRIP! I'm happy for Abby.
And I'm inspired too, since now I know, wishes DO come true! :)

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

*grin*

Re:

[adamchristopher.livejournal.com]

oops, Abbey

[cyan-blue.livejournal.com]

"I do believe in fairies! I do! I do!" (Peter Pan)

That's really impressive. So, as ever, is Abbey.

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

See, now you know why she frightens me sometimes. Manifest reality, indeed.

[catamorphism.livejournal.com]

Need pictures! Oh and yes, pet store employees are lying slugs in ditches who wouldn't know the difference between male and female guinea pigs at 3 months even if they bothered to try.

Re:

[koyaanisqatsi.livejournal.com]

You sure it wasn't pathenogenesis? ;-)

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

*snerk*

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

Need decent image-hosting, dag nabbit.

Re:

[catamorphism.livejournal.com]

I can hook you up with that once I get my server running again. Which basically requires that I plug in the machine, hit Power, and set up the hub some day when I come up from work rather than just sitting down in front of the working computer and checking LJ for three hours. It might be a couple months.

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

Oh, could you? *bouncebounce* Thank you ever so much! I don't want to impose on your generosity or your bandwidth, though...

Re:

[catamorphism.livejournal.com]

Bandwidth shouldn't be a problem. My laziness is the only barrier.

Re:

[nonethewiser.livejournal.com]

www.photobucket.com

[yendi]

*snort* Were you reading us back when Elayna had her "male" gerbils?

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

Ack, don't recall. How long ago?

[irisira03.livejournal.com]

It happens more than the pet stores would like to admit. A lot of times they can't tell if the guinea pigs are male or female, so males get put in the cages with females quite often.

It happens even more with rabbits. Heh. Go figure. ;-)

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

Marvy. You'd think that this would be a bit more cut-and-dried. I'm thinking of an employee training manual: "Tab A or Slot B?" (I can't believe I just said that....)

Re:

[catamorphism.livejournal.com]

If you actually take a good look at guinea pig genitalia, you'll notice that the male's and the female's equipment look very similar. The only way to tell the difference is to press down on its belly just above the genitals. If it's a female, nothing will happen (except for maybe she'll try to bite you), but if it's a male, well, you'll know. But when the animals are younger, the differences are even less obvious.

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

Who knew the next messiah would be a guinea pig?

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

*cough* *sputter*

immaculate conception??

[rubian77.livejournal.com]

Heh heh, you can name them Jesus and Christ.

Maybe you should change Chelsea's name to Mary!

[slipjig.livejournal.com]

*grin* Abbey wouldn't get it.

[daev.livejournal.com]

Let's consider the evidence:

1. We explained to her, to the best of our abilities, that Chelsea wouldn't be having any babies. That she lives alone in her cage. That she came from a pet store where they keep male and female critter-things strictly segregated.... The pet store has no idea how this happened....

2. The interesting thing is that we can't figure out how Chelsea got these things out of her in the first place. I mean, the little buggers are huge.

Q.E.D.: They aren't her babies. They're black furry space aliens in hiding, who snuck into the cage while you weren't looking.