For the full glider gun, I'd need to use my back

Ladies and gentlemen, I've finally found the Tattoo I Must Have:



(I forget who I ganked this link from. Help?)

In unrelated news, I wish I could duplicate the story a coworker told today involving her mom, a tray of vodka ice cubes, a mug of coffee, two cats and a can of (and I quote) "whippy-cream," but honestly, I could never, ever do it justice.