Why does Refresco hate me? Whyyyyy?

After the coconut soda horror show from the beginning of the month, I suppose I'd have been well-advised to avoid Goya sodas from here on out (the guanabana nectar not counting, as it is not a soda). But no, I had to tempt cruel fate again by purchasing a bottle of their "Cola Champagne" for my ongoing Taste Something New Every Day. This was certainly, um, new. Okay, you've heard of Kopi Luwak, the notorious "cat poop coffee," where they feed coffee beans to a civet, then wait for the beans to be excreted before being washed and roasted? Cola Champagne tastes like they tried the same theory with a bottle of A&W Cream Soda. Goya Refresco, you are dead to me now, forever more.

On the other hand, it was 51° when I woke up this morning. I'm not quite sure how to deal with that.